The Authentic Self is the Only Self a Leader Needs

We are all a little weird,
might as well bring it into the office.

We spend plenty of time discussing leadership on this blog.  I have spent most of my life learning lessons from a colorful group of mentors.  I have learned from marines, casino managers, technocrats, and creative professionals.  I have also spent time coaching young people in speech and debate.  The other day, one of my former students decided to blog about her experience working as a grade school principal.  I strongly recommend you give it read.  Something struck me in her prose and it was her observation that each day you have to bring your authentic self to work.  

Working in a global business can be dreary.  I had experiences of managers taking stuffed animals off desks because they did not look “professional.”  I vividly remember a vice-president saying, “I want the rest of the business to treat us as professionals instead of propellor heads.”  It meant that nerf guns, plush toys, and pictures of significant others came off desks.  It was sterile and depressing. Under fluorescent lighting and open office plans, we muddled through writing software.  It was joyless.  

I remember a plastic dinosaur left in a planter.  An administrative assistant adopted the creature and put a ribbon around its neck for a little color.  Six months later an executive having a bad day wrote a memo and instructed security to remove the planter because it did not reflect the professionalism of the firm.  The subtraction of the dinosaur did not increase the company dividend or share price.  It did not win a new customer contract or improve company morale.  It was a petty exercise in authority and power.  The experience stuck with me.  

Since childhood, I have always been a square peg in a round hole.  I was bullied mercilessly as a child by my peers.  I spent most of my middle school years getting beat up by others.  It was only in high school that I learned to begin the process of self-acceptance which continues to this day.  I found refuge in speech and theater.  I learned discipline from JROTC.  Writing allowed me to express myself in deeply personal ways.  I was a weird kid but that weirdness informed my personality and made me the person I am today.  

I bring that weird kid into the office each day.  I do not take myself too seriously but it took me about 25 years to learn the difference between being self-deprecating and negative self-talk.  I idolize goofy people like Bill Murray and Ernie Kovacs but discovered there was a time and place to be goofy and when to focus.   I have the perspective of a journalist in a business environment and I like calling out non-sense when I see it.   Naturally, my career has been very difficult because I am not a cookie-cutter executive.  I speak truth to power which is difficult for people unaccustomed to hearing “no”.  No one would accuse me of being a sycophant.  

Today, people still consider me a little weird but I try to be loyal to the people I serve.  I want to listen to their concerns and needs.  I am willing to tell a joke or wear a silly hat if it breaks tension on the team.  I will make bets with my team for them to surpass themselves which explains why there is a video of me somewhere on the internet dancing to the song “Happy” by Pharrell Williams.  I work for an organization that lets me be my authentic self and it makes me a better leader.  Being vulnerable and authentic is what makes leadership work.  I remember learning the term “mask of command,” in college.  Over my career, I have discovered the mask falls away and in times of crisis, you are exposed as the person you are.  It is better to have others know you as you are rather than as you want them to perceive.   

Being a leader is a life-changing opportunity.  To be successful, you need to put away your mask and bring your authentic self into work.  The people you serve will respect you.  It is the only way to make this opportunity worthwhile.  

Until next time.